Only One Person Can Stop Donald Trump, And It's...

I For One Welcome Our New Tiny-Handed Overlord Donald Trump Simpsons 

This election season, a lot of people are freaking out about Donald Trump possibly being the Republican Party's nominee for President of the United States. They have good causes for worry. My worry is that more Slovene fashion models will try to bed every blonde-haired blue-eyed German-American dude they see. Being a blonde-haired blue-eyed German-American dude myself, I should know. I already have enough problems on that front. That said, I think the worries of other folks trump mine.

 Mexican Restaurant Solidarity Anti-Donald Trump Sign

So, what to do? What to do? The Republican Party is already planning something to stop Trump at its national convention in Cleveland, Ohio, this summer. Individuals from all sorts of issue groups are presumably planning to protest at the convention as well. The local police are understandably freaking out, too, because Trump has implied that his supporters will riot in the streets if any shennanigans happen at the convention that stop him from being the nominee should he get a hefy lead in the GOP primaries. And Trump loves the police, right? Oi vey!

They Live Inspired Make America Great Again Donald Trump Poster 

At first, I thought that Donald Trump was just a joke candidate, putting on a good show like Andy Kaufman's character Tony Clifton, the male chauvinist show biz hack. Then I thought he was just promoting himself like how some folks believe why Kinky Friedman ran for governor of Texas. Then I went back to the thought about Andy Kaufman pretending to be a professional wrestler when taking on Jerry Lawler on David Letterman's show, after I heard Trump appeared on WWE. And then, I just ignored the whole thing because Leonardo DiCaprio won an Academy Award for best actor FINALLY!!! 

But, my conscience kept tapping me on my forehead: "Hey, man, who has the power to stop Donald Trump? Who really has the power to stop Donald Trump? Who REALLY has the power to stop Donald Trump? Who REALLY has the power to STOP Donald Trump?" Obviously, not the Republican Party. If anything, them, the protesters, and the media are fueling his fire, which means the political satirists on late nite television aren't helping either. Vince McMahon? Maybe. But at this point, I wouldn't be surprised if Vince is jocking for position as Trump's Secretary of Defense.

Who can really stop Trump? Jeb Bush is out and now on the sidelines. Chris Christie is out and now on Trump's team. Ben Carson is out and now on Trump's team. Marco Rubio is out and indicated that he will exit the Senate after his term is up. Paul Ryan refused an offer to be drafted as the nominee. Mitt Romney has already lost one presidential election, and primary voters have already indicated that *establishment* candidates are no good. What was the name of that chic who ran for the Republican nomination? Cyndi Lauper?

Naw. There's no way Cyndi Lauper could use her celebrity to stop Trump Goonies-style, even with the help of the ghost of Andre the Giant, may God rest his soul. If she could, she would have deep-sixed him already. She came out against his comments bashing Muslims and LGBT people, and look what happened! Nothing. Plus, she could have shut down Trump when she was on his show "The Apprentice," but she didn't. Maybe it's more accurate to say she couldn't. Anyway, he's still with us nonetheless. I think it's petty safe to say that no celebrity worth his or her weight in pirate treasure is able to stop Trump.

Yes, not even Jesse Ventura, I'm sorry to say. He ran for governor of Minnesota and won, leveraging his cred as a Navy SEAL turned professional wrestler to great effect, too. Truth is Jesse was for Donald before he was against him. I mean, you can't draft yourself to be Trump's vice-president, and then consider a bid for a third-party nomination for president afterward. It ain't gonna work. He's dead in the water. But it's a nice try. And I even like Jesse!

Give Me A Dollar Or I Will Vote For Donald Trump

Yeah, this picture above is where it's at, y'all. Take a long look at it. Take a nice long look at it. It basically sums up where we are politically as a nation. To venture a guess, I'd say this white guy is raising money for his wife's breast cancer treatment. He himself is out of a job, but he's doing everything in his power to help her. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm right. But I bet I'm more right than wrong, considering the current state of America's health insurance system, even under Obamacare. If I'm right, then, to borrow a phrase from the poet, "Here's your sign" on the rise of Trump.

How Do We Stop Donald Trump

I must agree with the above meme, but lest we forget that our so-called leaders in Washington are actually our representatives. Even the president is a representative. Sure, the president is the commander-in-chief holding office in the executive branch of government, but the president represents us nonetheless. You can't blame elected officials if you're voting (ie participating in The System in the first place). Plus, if you don't have an alternative vision for the current socio-political system, but still complain about how bad the current system is without doing anything about it, then why should we listen to you?

Shepard Fairey Obama Hope Inspired Donald Trump Nope Poster

Only one person can stop Donald Trump, and it's you, the American voter. If you want to. If you're up for it. You get to figure this one out in the remaining primaries and perhaps in the general election. It's on your shoulders. If I was that unemployed white guy by the highway exit ramp who is trying to raise money for his wife's breast cancer treatments, I would be just as frustrated as him at "The Establishment," but I wouldn't necessarily vote for a blonde-haired blue-eyed German-American dude with a lot of money and a hot wife to boot. I mean, The Donald has all the resources he needs to help his wife beat breast cancer, if she (God forbid) got cancer. Think about it.

 Awesome Dog I Want You To Vote

So who to vote for? Well, if you've got one guy who is Jewish with Polish roots (whose ancestors died at the hands of Nazis) and who is a self-described democratic socialist that may have a chance on one ticket, and you've got another guy that sounds like a white supremist proto-fascist who is almost a shoe-in for the nomination on another ticket, then wouldn't you like to see how THAT race plays itself out? I mean, wouldn't you like to see your fellow evanglical Christians try and figure that one out? There's "Black Lives Matter" and "All Lives Matter," but then there's "Jewish Lives Matter," too, you know? 

In this winner-take-all system we live, why take a chance on a third party candidate? With Sanders and Trump, you've already got two pie-in-the-sky visions of America. Plus, why take it to the streets? If you really believe in sticking it to the political establishment, shouldn't you take it out on the parties by making sure Sanders and Trump have fair fight at the polls? Right?

I'll say this about Bernie Sanders: If there is one candidate who will give you the shirt off his back, it's him. He's even game for giving every American a "universal basic income" without work requirements and regardless of their creed, color, and batting average. For more info, I invite you to read Scott Santens's piece On The Record: Bernie Sanders on Basic Income on Medium. By the way, Bill O'Reilly and Lou Dobbs are warm to the idea, too. Read: Fox News Praises the Alaska Model. But in the end, the choice is yours, America. The choice is yours.

To The Republic!